I just wanted to say that I missed you. I have this theory that if I think about a distant friend or they happened to come about my thoughts in a day... then that friend would hear me and respond to me in some shape or form.
I just watched this movie called "As Good as it Gets." For some strange reason, as awkward as the film was, I really liked the character's simple intense dialogues with one another. Each dialogue revealing something about their inner self. There were also themes of Good and Bad (or the Ugly as I call it) and how each character battles it out with these two forces within them.
I miss my friends because they bring out the good in me and for quite sometime I have been feeling rather stagnant about this city that I live in. There is something so isolating and windowless about it. My current surroundings are not conducive to my creativity and potential. How unfortunate.
I have also been a bit overwhelmed at the world as of late. The things that are going on, the forces that swirl all around me, the big changes that are about to happen. I feel disappointment and anger towards people. So much so that I feel a great sense of unease in myself. I wonder when it will go away. Will I see the good again?
I said goodbye to a very dear friend and love recently. It was very hard for me and remains so. What do you do when a person you talked to almost every day for the last year is suddenly not there to talk to you anymore? Sometimes I really just don't understand the things the world throws at me. Sometimes I feel that it is a bit too much. At the same time I am extremely happy and lucky to have crossed paths with him and to let him in my life like I did. It was him who helped me trust again. For that, I could never be unhappy about it. Through streams of tears I faintly told him that I loved him. I hope he heard.
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